What Changes When Your Realtor Actually Gets You
- Kevin A Petersen
- 2 days ago
- 5 min read
I've heard this story from too many clients and friends in the queer community—some version of it, anyway.
A queer couple walks into a showing. They love the house. They're already picturing their life there. Then the seller's agent looks at them and says, "Oh, so you two are... roommates?"
The mood shifts. The excitement drains. They leave without making an offer—not because of the house, but because they no longer feel safe in the process.
This is what happens when the people guiding your home search don't get it. And it's why representation matters.
The Moments You Shouldn't Have to Navigate Alone
Buying a home is already one of the most stressful experiences of your life. Now add these layers:
The pronoun dance. Explaining your relationship at every showing. Watching agents fumble or make assumptions. Deciding whether to correct them or just let it go because you're tired.
The neighborhood question. Wanting to ask, "Will we be safe here?" but not knowing if the agent will understand why you're asking—or have any idea how to answer.
The paperwork maze. Navigating documents that may not reflect your family structure. Wondering if the lender will ask invasive questions. Hoping the title company has worked with couples like you before.
The seller unknown. Not knowing if the person on the other side of the transaction will have a problem with who you are. Wondering if that "other offer" that beat yours was really better, or if something else was at play.
These aren't hypothetical concerns. They're the lived reality of house hunting for the queer community.
What Actually Changes
When you work with a realtor who genuinely understands LGBTQ+ experiences, here's what's different:
No Explaining Required!
I already know what chosen family means. I understand that your emergency contact might not be a blood relative. I won't ask intrusive questions about your relationship, your transition, or your family planning.
You can just focus on finding your home.
Honest Neighborhood Insights
When you ask, "Will we feel safe here?"—I know you're not asking about crime statistics.
I can tell you which neighborhoods have a visible queer community. Which areas are genuinely welcoming versus performatively tolerant. Where you might get looks, and where nobody will look twice.
This isn't information you'll find on Zillow. It comes from working with LGBTQ+ clients for years, from knowing the community, and from paying attention.
Advocacy When It Matters
Real estate transactions involve a lot of people: lenders, inspectors, appraisers, title companies, other agents, and more. Not all of them will be as affirming as they should be.
When I'm your agent, I'm your advocate in those rooms. I handle the awkward moments so you don't have to. I've had conversations with other agents about professionalism and respect—sometimes directly, sometimes through carefully chosen words that make the point without derailing the deal.
Your job is to find a home you love. My job is to clear the path.
Documentation That Fits Your Life
I've worked with clients across the spectrum of family structures: married couples, domestic partners, chosen families buying together, single buyers, and everything in between. I know how to structure offers and navigate paperwork in ways that protect you and reflect your reality.
If something doesn't fit the standard forms, we figure it out. You shouldn't have to squeeze your life into boxes designed for someone else.
The Right Questions, Asked Differently
A typical agent might ask: "Are you looking for good schools?"
I might ask: "What does daily life look like for you? What do you need to feel at home?"
Maybe you want walkability to LGBTQ+ nightlife. Maybe you want a quiet suburb where you can blend in. Maybe you need to be near a specific medical provider. Maybe you want a big backyard for your dog and your chosen family's Sunday dinners.
Your priorities are your priorities. I'm here to help you find a home that fits your actual life—not some template of what buyers are "supposed" to want.
The Practical Differences
Beyond the emotional and social dimensions, there are practical ways an LGBTQ+ affirming agent adds value:
Network knowledge. I know which lenders have experience with LGBTQ+ clients and won't make the financing process painful. I know which inspectors and contractors are allies. I can recommend LGBTQ+-friendly service providers throughout the process.
Market insight. I track not just prices, but community dynamics. Which neighborhoods are seeing an influx of queer residents. Where new LGBTQ+-friendly businesses are opening. Where community is growing.
Legal awareness. I stay informed about housing discrimination issues and can help you recognize—and respond to—potential red flags in how you're treated during transactions.
What This Isn't
I want to be clear about something: working with an LGBTQ+-affirming agent isn't about special treatment. It's about equal treatment.
It's about not having to educate your realtor while also trying to buy a house. It's about working with someone who sees you as a person first, not a category to figure out. It's about the baseline respect and understanding that should be standard, but often isn't.
You deserve an agent who's as focused on your home search as you are—not one who's still catching up on terminology or making assumptions based on stereotypes.
The Salt Lake Market Right Now
Since you're here, let me give you the real picture.
Salt Lake City's median home price is currently around $570,000-$618,000, depending on the source and the month. That's about 26-35% higher than the national average. Homes typically sell within 40-55 days, though desirable properties move faster.
The market is still competitive. Inventory is improving but remains tight. Interest rates have stabilized somewhat, but aren't dropping significantly yet.
Here's what that means for you: if you're waiting for a "better" time to buy, you might be waiting a while. Prices are projected to continue rising (around 3% growth expected through 2025). And this isn't speculation—Salt Lake's growth is driven by real demand. The population is booming, the job market is strong, and housing supply simply can't keep up. This isn't a bubble; it's a market with solid fundamentals that's been appreciating steadily for years.
And here's the flip side of high home prices: rent is high too. The difference is, your landlord is building equity with your monthly payment—not you. Every month you wait, you're paying someone else's mortgage while prices continue to climb.
Many of my clients are buying now with plans to refinance later if rates drop meaningfully. Because even at current prices, homeownership is wealth-building. It's stability. It's yours.
Ready to Talk?
Whether you're just starting to think about buying, actively searching, or ready to make offers, I'm here for a real conversation about your goals.
No pressure. No judgment. Just an honest discussion about what you're looking for and how we can find it together.
I've helped many LGBTQ+ clients find their homes in Salt Lake City and the surrounding areas. I'd be honored to help you find yours.
Wondering if this is your year to buy a home? Let's take the first step. You can bring your questions (and your doubts) to my ASK ME ANYTHING LIVE STREAM. See you soon.
Kevin A Petersen is an LGBTQ+ affirming real estate agent serving buyers and sellers throughout the Salt Lake City area. Schedule a no-pressure conversation about your home buying goals.
Schedule time with me -HTTPS://KAPRealEstate.com/Book
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